Healing In Time
Healing from Trauma: Moving at the Your Own Pace
When we experience trauma, especially complex PTSD, there’s often a sense of urgency that can surface. Many of my clients express frustration, saying, "I should be past this by now," or "Why can’t I get it together?" These feelings are completely understandable, but it’s important to remember that healing from trauma is not a race—it’s a process, and it unfolds in time.
Why Pacing Matters in Trauma-Informed Therapy
When I work with clients who are struggling with complex PTSD, there’s often an internal conflict between parts of themselves. Some parts of them—those that hold the urgency and the need for immediate relief—want to move quickly and feel better now. They may push the person to do more, be more, fix everything all at once. On the other hand, there are parts that are scared, hesitant, or overwhelmed by the idea of change.
This is why, in trauma-informed therapy, we talk a lot about pacing. Healing from trauma takes time. Just like we were wounded in time, we also heal in time. One of the most important aspects of our work together is moving at the pace that all parts of you can handle. Sometimes, this means slowing down, even when there’s a strong urge to push forward.
Healing Takes Time: The Importance of Patience in Trauma Recovery
I always remind my clients: we can’t rush recovery. And we can’t force healing. Trauma recovery isn’t about checking boxes or meeting deadlines. It’s about reconnecting with yourself, finding safety in your body, and re-establishing trust with others, including your therapist.
The pace of this work is about honoring your nervous system, listening to your body’s cues, and respecting where you are in your journey. Some days will feel harder than others. Some days, you may take two steps forward and one step back. And that’s okay. It’s all part of the healing process.
The Secret Fear: Will I Be in Therapy Forever?!
And for those of you who secretly fear that trauma therapy is a lifelong commitment (like, am I going to be in therapy for twenty years?!)—I get it! It’s natural to feel overwhelmed when thinking about the long road to healing. However, it’s important to know that my goal is not to keep you in therapy indefinitely. My focus is on helping you heal at a pace that’s right for you, while equipping you with the tools and skills you need to move forward efficiently and effectively.
Some clients do work with me for longer periods, but many find that they begin to feel relief, reconnect with their sense of self, and create lasting change in a matter of months to years. It’s not about being stuck in therapy for decades—it’s about progress, at your pace, with the right tools and support.
How Long Does Therapy Take for Trauma? The Science Behind It
Your healing is unique, and so is your timeline. If you find yourself feeling impatient or discouraged, remember that healing isn’t linear. It doesn’t follow a set pattern, and it isn’t always fast. But it is real, and it is happening. The work you’re doing today may not always feel like it’s "fixing" everything, but it’s planting seeds for long-term healing.
Research on trauma recovery, including therapies like EMDR and attachment-based interventions, shows that healing doesn’t happen overnight. The neurobiological changes required to heal trauma take time—your nervous system needs to relearn safety and trust. But with each session, you are building resilience and regaining a sense of control over your body and life.
Moving at Your Own Pace: The Key to Trauma Healing
When I work with clients who are feeling frustrated or overwhelmed, I remind them, "I can really hear this urgent part of you. You want relief, and that’s valid." But I also remind them that healing from trauma isn’t about forcing change. It’s about being kind to ourselves, showing up for our healing, and allowing ourselves the time to grow.
Together, we can heal at the pace that feels right for you.
